The Hitman’s Bodyguard (2017)

Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Samuel L. Jackson, Salma Hayek, Gary Oldman, Élodie Yung, Joaquim de Almeida, and Richard E. Grant
Grade: C

There was a lot of potential here, but The Hitman’s Bodyguard isn’t nearly as good as it could’ve or should’ve been.

Summary

Michael Bryce (Reynolds) is a “Triple-A” rated private bodyguard and has the perfect life. He kisses his girlfriend Amelia (Yung) and heads off to protect a wealthy arms dealer named Takashi Kurosawa. Everything goes smoothly. However, when Kurosawa gets on the plane, he is shot in the head from a distance.

Two years later, Bryce is a shell of his former self with a total attitude change towards his job and life altogether. The Kurosawa mission ruined him. Because of this, he now takes smaller bodyguard jobs. To give you a good idea of where his head is at, he pisses in a bottle and leaves it in his car.

Who the hell does that? This guy really is a mess. After this, he goes on one of his smaller bodyguard jobs by helping his client Mr. Seifert (Grant) escape. Though he’s still great at what he does, Michael isn’t “Triple-A” rated anymore and it’s killing him.

Over in Belarus, evil dictator Vladislav Dukhovich (Oldman) goes to some lowly teacher’s house and gives him shit for speaking against him in his lessons. Naturally, Dukhovich kills the teacher’s wife and kid in front of him. We then jump to Dukhovich being on trial for crimes against humanity at the International Criminal Court. The teacher gives his testimony of what happened and explains that after that horrible incident, he was sent to an internment camp for three years. Dukhovich’s lawyer argues that there’s no evidence to the man’s claims and his objection is sustained. Outside of the trial, everyone wants Dukhovich’s head on a platter. There are protests happening and even the media questions whether someone will come forward with a solid testimony.

We then see imprisoned hitman Darius Kincaid (Jackson) being pulled out for a meeting with officials. They agree to pardon Kincaid’s wife Sonia (Hayek) if Kincaid testifies against Dukhovich. Kincaid maintains Sonia is innocent and despite him only being offered “leniency” for himself, he accepts the deal. He is transported on a bus from Manchester to the Netherlands for Dukohovich’s trial. Also, he’s being transported by Michael Bryce’s now ex-girlfriend Amelia who is an Interpol agent. On the way there, Kincaid tells Amelia and her team that every witness that has testified has been killed, and they will come after him too. Amelia’s team tries to tell him that everything has been taken care of, but Kincaid ends up being completely right. On the ride there, they are attacked. Everyone is killed except Amelia and Kincaid, who end up escaping to some safe house. Darius explains that Amelia can’t contact anyone at Interpol because they have to be the people that set her up since they were the only ones who knew about the mission. As he treats his wounds, he tells her she needs to contact someone completely out of the loop to help them. She contacts Bryce, though he’s not willing to help because things ended badly between them. However, she is able to convince him by threatening to make sure his coveted “Triple-A” rating as a bodyguard can never happen again because of her connections. As Interpol begins their manhunt for Kincaid and Amelia and discuss a potential leak in their team, Kincaid contacts Sonia in prison. He treats his wound as they talk on the phone until the line cuts.

Bryce shows up at Amelia’s place and immediately starts an argument about how she is the reason he lost his rating. He reveals that for the first time ever, he revealed a client’s name to her, and it managed to leak. She finally flips out and says she left him not to further her career, but because he wouldn’t stop blaming her for something she never did. He calms down and goes to meet the “person” he is supposed to transport, not realizing its Kincaid. They have big history with each other and when they first see each other, they immediately fight until Kincaid passes out due to the blood loss from his previous wound. The leak in Interpol turns out to be one of Amelia’s superiors in the French Assistant Director of Interpol Jean Foucher (Almeida), and he goes and meets with Dukhovich to try and adjust his deal. Dukhovich refuses and stabs his hand with a pen, demanding Kincaid be killed. If Kincaid is dead before the trial, Foucher will be paid in full.

Now, it’s a race against time because Michael is promised by Amelia, she will help him get back his elite bodyguard status as long as he is able to keep Kincaid (a man that has tried to kill him 28 times) alive and to the trial.

My Thoughts:

Everything that is needed for this to be THE buddy action comedy of the 2010s is there. It’s got a cool premise, a star-studded cast, good action, and very good chemistry between the two leads. The problem is that it just wasn’t that good as a whole. It’s so predictable, uneventful, and cliché, it’s just decent and nothing more.

Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L. Jackson make a solid team and their bickering and fighting can be pretty funny, but it’s just not enough to carry the film. It doesn’t feel nearly as funny as it should be considering the talent. It’s just pretty much what you’d expect, with our stars sticking to the personas they’ve honed over years and years. Reynolds sticks to his sarcastic quips that are all chuckle-worthy, and Jackson sticks to his “Motherfucker” bits. After that, we don’t hear anything new. There are a lot of humorous situations but nothing funny enough to write home about. All of the elements are there too. It just felt a little disappointing. Salma Hayek is a fun addition and her and Darius being this “match made in hell” is a funny idea, but nothing really comes of it. Gary Oldman plays a dictator character that I feel like I’ve seen done maybe a thousand times before this film, and he offers nothing new in his characterization either. He’s brutal and evil. That’s really all we know about him. Any scene involving his character offers little to nothing of entertainment value because we’ve seen this type of generic villain done so many times. His character kind of drags down the energy of the film too.

The film just feels darker in look and style (most of the film is legitimately grey), and it doesn’t fit the buddy action-comedy vibe they’re going for. I’m not sure if I’m accusing the movie of taking itself too seriously or just admitting there is a noticeable tonal switch every time Dukhovich enters the frame. I just feel like making the movie a bit goofier might have helped it. At the very least, more could’ve been done with the cinematography to make things look less boring and generic. Personally, I’m thinking of a feeling similar to The Nice Guys. That tone, look, and style is something that The Hitman’s Bodyguard should’ve tried to emulate to improve the quality of the presentation. Something like that would’ve made this film a lot more worthwhile. On the other hand, maybe they should’ve just done more with the Dukhovich character. I don’t know. It just felt like anybody could’ve played the role if they were going to write the character like that. Why waste a talent like Gary Oldman on it if you weren’t going to have him do anything of note?

Élodie Yung and Reynolds have a nice dynamic and their relationship is one of the bigger highlights of the film. She’s the only person that can get Bryce to understand and listen and that was nice to see. Plus, when they argue it’s pretty funny too. It’s just not enough to save the movie.

The story starts to get into cliché territory very quickly, and though it has some funny moments (that all revolve around either Reynolds saying a great line or him and Jackson talking shit), it’s just not enough for me to really say this is a must-watch. The Hitman’s Bodyguard has some redeeming moments for the buddy action-comedy subgenre, but it’s just not very special at all. It would be passable for a lower-level cast, but there’s too much talent here for this film to be such an incredibly subpar project.

It’s far from being sequel-worthy too.

Of course, we got one anyway.