Starring: Paul Newman, Tom Cruise, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, John Turturro, Forest Whitaker and Bill Cobbs, with a voice cameo from Martin ScorseseGrade: A Is Paul Newman [Read More…]
Starring: Brad KestenGrade: C- I loved it when Lucy asks Schroeder what he thinks is in the sky, and he guesses it’s a star, a planet, [Read More…]
Starring: Chad AllenGrade: B+ “You know how I always dread the whole year? Well, this time, I’m only going to dread one day at a [Read More…]
Starring: Brett JohnsonGrade: D+ “This is going to be some wedding. Half the guests are going to eat off paper plates, and the other half [Read More…]
Starring: Brigitte Nielsen, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Sven-Ole ThorsonGrade: D+ It kills me that we didn’t get Conan the Conqueror, but we got Red Sonja. Summary In [Read More…]
Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Wilt Chamberlain, Grace Jones, Tracy Walter, Mako, Sven-Ole Thorsen, and André the GiantGrade: A Had John Milius directed the screenplay for Conan the [Read More…]
Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Mako, Max von Sydow, and Sven-Ole ThorsenGrade: B+ I would genuinely be surprised if they said animals weren’t harmed in [Read More…]
Starring: Burt Reynolds and Goldie HawnGrade: C- I’m not sure how this movie managed to snatch an Academy Award nomination for Best Original Song. The [Read More…]
Starring: Garry ShandlingGrade: A- You ever go to bed with a woman and the next morning she looks like Ed Sullivan? You’re in for a [Read More…]
Starring: Vincent PriceGrade: A- This had to have been about Tim Burton himself, right? Summary Completely through spoken rhymes, the narrator (Price) tells the story [Read More…]
