Kick-Ass 2 (2013)

Starring: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Chloë Grace Moretz, Jim Carrey, Morris Chestnut, Clark Duke, Donald Faison, John Leguizamo, Yancy Butler, Daniel Kaluuya, Benedict Wong, and Chuck Liddell
Grade: B–

Kick-Ass: “People want to do good!”

The Motherfucker: “No, people want to win the lottery! People want to fuck Scarlett Johansson!”

Well, the villain wins the first round.

Summary

Now that they only have each other, Dave Lizewski (Taylor-Johnson) trains under the more experienced Mindy Macready/Hit-Girl (Moretz) to further develop his skills as Kick-Ass. Just like how Damon did with her in the first Kick-Ass, Mindy explains to Dave how a bullet from a handgun travels at more than 700mph while pulling it out of her bag. Immediately, Dave doesn’t want to go through the exercise, so she says he doesn’t have to. Right after, she shoots him in the chest to test the bulletproof vest he’s wearing. It works. He’s happy but does not want to do it again. She says it’s fine but readies another pistol. He turns, and Mindy shoots him in the back.

Through narration, Dave talks about how he previously wondered why no one decided to try and become a superhero. However, he found out Mindy already had. After her father Damon/Big Daddy died in the first movie, his old partner in the police department Marcus (Chestnut) became Mindy’s legal guardian. Marcus dropped her off every day for school. As soon as he left though, she would leave too. No one at school found out because she hacked into the server and gave herself the award for perfect attendance. As we know, Hit-Girl and Big Daddy were the real deal. Mindy was going to keep wearing the mask as long as there were criminals to take down, but no matter how many drug dealers she stopped, she couldn’t stop feeling alone. As Dave narrates this, Mindy goes through her training and puts two cups of hot chocolate and extra marshmallows on the table before looking at a framed picture on the wall of her father. At the same time, Dave gave up being a superhero because of how dangerous it was, but he was starting to get really bored. Like most high school seniors, Dave had no idea what he wanted to do in life. He didn’t even know what TV channel he wanted to watch. His best friends Todd (Augustus Prew) and Marty (Duke) still had no clue he was the first superhero to go public. On the news, we see that two years since the first regular citizens started the superhero movement, many followed in New York. Dr. Gravity (Faison) is interviewed, and he states that he became a superhero because of Kick-Ass, along with a few others. Seeing how he inspired people while watching the news, Dave decides to put on his old costume after dinner. He has trouble with the costume and his dad (Garrett M. Brown) walks in. From the doorway, it looks like he’s jerking off and he tells Dave that it’s normal to touch himself, prompting Dave to yell at him to leave. Still, Dave knows that if he’s coming out of retirement, he has to take it seriously. He finds Mindy before school when she’s about to take a taxi out of there and pitches her on a Batman and Robin-like partnership. Mindy notes how much more advanced she is than him, so Dave wants to be trained by her.

Calling her the closest thing there is to being a real superhero, Dave asks her if she’s tired of being on her own and talks about how great it would be for someone to be there for her.

On the promise that he will do anything she says, they meet in her dojo. Right away, she demands Dave hit her. He’s not sure about hitting a 15-year-old girl, but she slaps the shit out of him to provoke him (“Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch”). They get into a brawl, and she takes him out rather quickly. This went on every day for three weeks, as the training intensified. Even with his damaged nerve endings, it hurt, but he kind of liked it because it gave him purpose. It was like they were driving towards something. One of these training sessions was the opening scene of the bulletproof vest testing. Moving on, Dave talks about how he couldn’t tell his girlfriend Katie (Lyndsy Fonseca), Marty, or Todd, but he didn’t care because they were having too much fun. They start bonding, and Dave starts getting better. Following one session, they enjoy some hot chocolate together. Meanwhile, Chris D’Amico (Mintz-Plasse) is living in a mansion with just his mother Angie (Butler) following his father Frank’s death in the previous film. He gets mad with her for deleting the news off the DVR because they were talking about Kick-Ass. Angie tells him to stop being so obsessed with the superhero, but Chris tells her that Kick-Ass is a murderer that blew up Frank with a bazooka. Angie corrects him and says Frank died in a fire. Chris can’t believe what he’s hearing and demands to know what her problem is. She explains that Chris is the issue. She’s trying to raise him to be a normal boy. This is why they moved to Long Island after Frank died from what she refers to as “his accident”. Chris responds by saying a bazooka is not an accident and calls her delusional and a bitch, so Angie storms out of the room. Chris tries to storm out, but Angie’s bodyguard Javier (Leguizamo) stands in front of Chris to stop him. Angie gets into her tanning bed, and Chris goes over to yell at her for homeschooling him like he’s a prisoner and for getting rid of his Red Mist costume. He tells her that he wishes she were dead before kicking the tanning bad several times over. It short circuits, sparks, blows up, and kills her. He instantly regrets it.

In Mindy’s training facility, Dave tries to touch a syringe filled with some green liquid, but Mindy tells him not to. He asks what it is, and she explains that it’s a last resort, implying it’s a suicide option if all else fails.

Dave questions if she’s afraid to die. She says she’s not, even though Dave brings up the possibility. Mindy brings up how her father wasn’t afraid of dying, so Dave counters with pointing out what happened to him. Bypassing this, Mindy talks about how Damon knew he would have to make the ultimate sacrifice one day, which is why he made Mindy promise she’d never stop defending the city. Dave comments that Damon was insane, but she corrects him and calls her father the world’s first superhero. It wasn’t Kick-Ass or Red Mist. It was Damon Macready, and “It was an honor to serve by his side”. Later, Mindy gets home, and Marcus asks how school was. She comes up with some lie over teacher frustrations, but he can see through it. He brings up how Principal Himoff called him yesterday because she was supposed to receive the award for perfect attendance but didn’t show up. So, Marcus followed her today, saw her get into a cab with “some boy”, but lost her over the bridge. He demands to know where she was. She tries to act really sorry, but Marcus cuts her off from attempting to fake cry. She gets serious but lies again and says a boy asked her to cut class and go to the mall, so she did. At first, he doesn’t buy it and wants her to confirm it has nothing to do with her trying to be Hit-Girl and he won’t find weapons under her bed. She doubles down and adds that she wants the boy to like her, so Marcus takes it seriously and says skipping school is not the right way to get a boy to like her. He offers to get her pizza because he can see she’s down and tells her that he won’t ground her. It’s just a warning. Back at Chris’s place, Chris packs Angie’s stuff with plans of giving it away, and Javier helps him. He compliments an old pair of guns she owns, but Chris tells him they were his father’s. Javier encourages him to keep the guns, and Chris is happy with it. Next, Chris awkwardly picks up a box of leather lingerie and sex toys that were in a briefcase and leaves. Sometime after, Mindy grabs Dave to try his first field test, giving him the clothes of a pimp to wear. He walks down the street, and Mindy is communicating with him through his earpiece. He questions why he isn’t wearing his Kick-Ass gear, but she explains that this is the whole point.

Kick-Ass isn’t the costume. It’s who he really is. She considers Dave himself to be the mask.

Not long after, a group corner Dave in the alley and try to attack him. He does pretty good for a bit until he’s overwhelmed and gets the shit kicked out of him, forcing Mindy as Hit-Girl to step in and brutally take them all out. The cops show up soon after, so Dave tells her to go, and he will tell the cops she saved him. On dispatch, they describe her, and Marcus hears it on his radio knowing it’s Mindy. Marcus calls Mindy while she’s running and notes that she answered her phone, so he knows she’s not at school. She lies and says she was but wasn’t feeling good, which is why the nurse sent her home. He tells her that he will be home soon, he will make her soup, and they’ll watch Jeopardy together. She agrees, gets on a purple motorcycle, and speeds home to beat Marcus. She just manages to get there in time and gets into her bed. Marcus runs up the stairs and sees her, so he tries to call her bluff. He checks her face and notes how clammy she feels, so he’s about to get the soup. When she turns her head to feign sleep though, Marcus sees the blood on her neck. He takes the covers off and she’s still in her superhero costume, confirming his suspicions. He goes on about how he can’t do this anymore, how Damon was like a brother to him and was a great cop, but his superhero side of Big Daddy was not her father. It robbed her of her childhood. He tells Mindy that she’s not Hit-Girl. She’s Mindy Macready, and she’s just starting high school. She may not know who she is yet, but she will. She just has to try. Mindy tells him that she doesn’t want to, but Marcus tells her that she’s not an adult yet. She argues that she’s done more in 15 years than what most adults have done in a lifetime, which is fair. Even so, Marcus brings up the note her father gave her in case anything were to happen and asks her what it said. Mindy admits that it said Marcus was to take care of her, and she was to listen to him. With this, he demands she go back to school, she stop talking to the boy, and he wants her to promise this will never happen again. With saddened eyes, she promises to do so. At school the next day, Dave waits for Mindy, but she never shows up.

Dave finds Mindy inside and brings up how she almost got him killed and she stood him up. She apologizes, which actually surprises him. He tries to get her to head out, but she explains she’s done with everything and that it’s over, despite his pleads to her. Marty and Dave’s girlfriend Katie hears the last part out of context. Marty starts laughing, and Katie slaps him for not only “fucking” a freshman but getting dumped by one too. Dave tries to explain it’s not what it looks like, and it has to do with Kick-Ass without saying it out loud. Katie understands but brings up Malik from the needle exchange she works at, adding that his dick is so much bigger than Kick-Ass’s. At Chris’s house, Javier calls for him because his tutor just got there, but he finds Chris wearing the leather costume they found in his mom’s room and dual wielding Frank’s pistols in the mirror. Chris tells Javier that since his dad was a crime boss, he is destined to become a supervillain. Javier tries to calm him down, but Chris refuses to answer to his own name and his superhero name Red Mist. Now, he will be going by the name “The Motherfucker”. Following this, Dave goes back to the streets and returns to being Kick-Ass. The only problem is that he was still alone, so he went online and found the physics professor known as Dr. Gravity. Shortly after, the two are hanging out on the street, and Gravity shows him the Zero-G device he “invented”. He acts like it can levitate any object up to a ton, but he’s just joking. It’s just a bat wrapped in tin foil. He’s not a physics professor either. He’s a copywriter for an ad agency, but that’s why he loves this stuff. He can be anyone he wants to be. The two discuss nervousness being on their own, how Gravity has never even been in a fight, and how Gravity has a friend that is interested in forming a team. He asks if Dave is interested, and Dave is excited since he was going to bring it up to Gravity anyway because that’s what he wanted to do. With this, Gravity promises to show him the guy’s picture after he hits the bathroom. Across the city, Javier tells Chris that his Uncle Ralph (Iain Glen) is not going to be happy with his decisions, but Chris refuses to answer to his name again.

Javier doesn’t want to call him by his new name, but Chris reminds him that he used to work for his dad, he worked for his mom, and now Javier works for him. He brings up how he’s probably the richest kid in New York City, so he tells Javier to find another job if he doesn’t like it. As Dave waits outside for Gravity to return from the restroom, two guys show up, one is recording and the other pulls out a weapon to attack him because it will get him a million hits on YouTube. Dave gets his ass kicked until Gravity helps Dave fend them off. The two guys run across the street to collect more guys. Dave and Gravity see this, so they go their separate ways for the night to escape. During this, Gravity tells Dave that the team meeting is tomorrow and he will email him the address. With Chris, he goes in his new “Motherfucker” supervillain costume and robs a corner store, but he’s mad because the guy doesn’t have security cameras since they are too expensive. The whole point of the robbery was for him to go viral, and now he can’t. Improvising, he tells the clerk to get on the ground and to tell people the Motherfucker was here. An old customer walks in and starts talking shit about the improper way he’s holding the gun, but Chris yells at him to get down. The old man takes so long, Chris fires the gun in frustration and he hits his own face with the gun because of the recoil. He gets mad and starts shooting the glass on the fridges in the back. Chris runs to the car and has Javier drive him away. In the car, Chris notes how alive he feels, how he sees this as his purpose, and how he’s going to “fuck this world up”. He wants to start training and tells Javier to get him in contact with some MMA guys like Chuck Liddell. He doesn’t care how much it costs. His goal is to kill Kick-Ass with his bare hands. Once he states all of this, he decides to Tweet about it. The next day, Dave texts Mindy and says he’s behind Murphy’s Bar in the Bowery and how her dad would want her to be there. Mindy replies in text that she can’t join a team because of her father and how he wouldn’t understand. Just then, Marcus readies a reluctant Mindy for a slumber party at Brooke’s (Claudia Lee) house. She doesn’t want to go and says she’d rather be waterboarded than listen to Justin Bieber.

When she says, “It’s a slumber party for fuck’s sake”, Marcus makes her a put a $1 in the swear jar. She does so but tells him that he will need a bigger jar.

At the secret bar location, Gravity lets Dave in, and they take the elevator down, with Dave impressed because it’s like a secret lair. Once they get down there, Dave sees the whole team and their leader, Col. Stars and Stripes (Carrey), the guy who owns the place. He welcomes Dave to Justice Forever. Meanwhile, Marcus takes Mindy to Brooke’s house and tells them to have fun, and he will be there to pick up Mindy in the morning. Brooke brings Mindy in to meet her two friends, and they all assume Mindy fucked Dave. Once she dispels all of their other assumptions, Brooke realizes she’s never even kissed a boy. Mindy doesn’t see the big deal in kissing, so Brooke shows her a music video of boy band Union J. Mindy accuses them of loving this bullshit like how fanboys love Stan Lee, but they have no idea who Stan Lee is. Mindy then watches the video for a bit and becomes mesmerized. Clearly, her hormones are kicking in, and Brooke tells her to embrace it. Weirded out, Mindy tries to leave. One of the friend’s stops her because they planned on getting high on bath salts at Logan’s house. Brooke changes the subject and offers Mindy a spot in her friend group, a spot that girls in their class would kill for. She talks about how great it is to walk in skintight clothing, knowing how everyone worships you and tries to further influence Mindy by asking if she wants to sneak out at night and raise hell to show people how independent she is. When she asks Mindy if she wants to belong, Mindy asks if it’s cool that she wears what she’s wearing to Logan’s, confirming she will stay. At the underground bar, Dave meets the other team members. Two of them are a husband-and-wife duo who lost their son Tommy and were given no help from the cops, newspapers, or the internet. Nothing ever came up, and they never saw Tommy again. They came up with the name “Remembering Tommy”, and Col. Stars and Stripes saw them online and reached out to them. Night-Bitch (Lindy Booth) became her alter ego after her sister was found murdered in a dumpster, and Insect Man (Robert Emms) was bullied his whole life for being gay, so now he stands up for the defenseless. He actually doesn’t wear a mask because it’s too similar to being in the closet.

Then, there’s Battle Guy. It’s clearly Marty in costume, but he lies and says his parents were mugged and killed coming home from the opera. The killer apparently maxed out their credit cards on porno sites too. Dave outs him as Marty, but Marty denies it after spitting out his coffee in shock. Dave reveals he’s Dave and he’s actually been Kick-Ass this whole time, and Marty is ecstatic. Stars and Stripes asks if they know each other, and Dave confirms, saying they’ve known each other since they were five. He asks what kind of bullshit he was spewing about his parents being killed, and Marty laughs. Stars and Stripes is bothered by cussing and lets him know about it. Then, he gets mad with Marty for lying, as does everyone else. Marty tries to explain that when he found them online, everyone was swapping cool origin stories. He uses Stars and Stripes as an example for being ex-Mafia but uses the lord’s name in vain when he says it, and Stars and Stripes gets mad at him again. Marty apologizes but comments that he didn’t think they would let him join the team if he didn’t have a good backstory. Stars and Stripes lets it go. Next, he shows Dave and everyone what he has set up to be the new meeting room. He tells Dave that it would be an honor for Kick-Ass to join the team, and he excitedly accepts. At school the next day, Brooke and her friends ask where Mindy was at during lunch. She explains she goes to Olive Garden to carbo load. They don’t see this as acceptable because the goal is to achieve the perfect figure, so Brooke walks her over to sign up for the varsity dance team. In the hallway, Mindy and Dave share a glance. Dave then turns to walk with Marty, who is still excited to know Dave is Kick-Ass. Todd joins them and asks what they’re talking about, but they change the subject. Todd gets discouraged and leaves. Dave tries to stop him but turns around and accidentally runs into a goth kid who threatens Dave’s life. Marty tells Dave to forget about. He’s just a guy that follows the Motherfucker on Twitter. Dave hasn’t heard of the Motherfucker, so Marty explains how he’s claiming to be the world’s first supervillain and has a thousand followers already.

Of course the goth kids would like him… No surprise there.

At the MMA gym, Chris goes through a sparring session against a fighter (Kaluuya) with Chuck Liddell in his corner. Javier asks Liddell if Chris really has a shot, and he actually think he does. Chris tries a few sucker punches, but the guy beats his ass until Javier stops the fight. Chris comes to the conclusion that his superpower is being rich, so he offers the fighter money to beat people up for him. The man accepts, so Chris tells another to get the man a mask and a costume. Looking at him, Chris comes up with the name “Black Death” for him. Javier tells him how racist this is, but Chris says he doesn’t care and to put out the word he’s paying top dollar for every hired hitter in town. Javier is unsure but gets excited to help once Chris talks about how it’s his first step to being his own man. Right after this, Chris waves cash to everyone around the ring with the offer of becoming a supervillain and how he will pay more than Liddell, referring to Liddell as “Little Dick”. Liddell is about to attack Chris, but Javier steps in front of Liddell to calm him down. At dance practice, Brooke talks about how she’s been studying privately with Coach Podell (Trenyce Cobbins). By studying, she means her mom paid off Podell to put her on varsity. Brooke promises to get Mindy on the team if she’s half-decent, at the very least as an alternate. Mindy can’t believe she would do that for her, and Brooke tells her that besties stick together. Her two friends are jealous hearing this, with one saying she’s trying to recreate Mindy in her own image. Following this, the girls do their try-out dances, and Brooke starts things out with some slutty routine. Mindy is called up next, and she can’t help but be nervous. Brooke assures her that as long as she doesn’t fall on her face, she’s in. Mindy goes in front of the class and imagines there are four attackers, there is no escape, and she’s Hit-Girl. With this, she shows off her acrobatics and athletic martial arts moves and everyone is impressed. When everyone stands up and cheers for her and Podell noticeably smiles, Brooke looks threatened. A few of the girls compliment her and say she was so much better than Brooke and that Brooke doesn’t have a shot at captain now.

Later that night, Justice Forever is in the meeting room in costume looking up unsolved crimes on the internet. They work on adding to their costumes and weaponry through teamwork, creativity, and their limited budget. In the middle of the montage, Stars and Stripes talks about how perverts and pedophiles will get a visit from his dog Eisenhower. On command, Eisenhower eats a hot dog out of his hand. In the meantime, Stars and Stripes works on training the team as well. Dave is enjoying himself, likening the experience to making honor roll and playing varsity football since he never did any of that. When they take a group picture, the sexual chemistry between Dave and Night-Bitch becomes noticeable too. Dave and Marty’s confidence is at an all-time high because of the group, and it shows in their real lives at school. Dave thanks Stars and Stripes, but he thanks Dave instead, saying that his job as Kick-Ass proved every man could make a difference. Without Kick-Ass, none of them would be there. He also tells Dave to not let it go to his head. Once Stars and Stripes leaves, Night-Bitch takes Dave to fuck in the bathroom stall. She won’t let him take the mask off either, as she prefers they both keep theirs on. At school, Dave tries to convince Mindy to join his team because no one on it is as good as her. He tells her Remembering Tommy owns a fruit business and Night-Bitch teaches ballet. When Mindy makes fun of her for sounding like a porno name, Dave says she’s a little of both, prompting Mindy to correctly guess he’s fucking her. Even so, Dave tells her to break her promise to Marcus because she is a superhero, and Mindy Macready is just a disguise, flipping her logic back at her. Mindy lets Dave know that if he really thinks she would ever break her word, he clearly has no idea who she is. Dave comments that dance team won’t stop her from being who she is and Hit-Girl wouldn’t give a shit about what high school girls are into. When Dave adds that she wouldn’t go on a date if her life depended on it, Mindy tells him to go to hell.

To prove him wrong, she asks a random football player named Simon (Wesley Morgan) if he wants to go out, and he’s down. Dave tries to apologize to Mindy, but she goes into the car. Marcus asks if there is a problem, but she says there isn’t. Marcus looks at Dave and says, “Good because I don’t like problems” before getting back into the car. At home, Dave’s dad notes that their neighbor Mrs. Neipert said she saw Dave sneaking out at 2AM, so he asks if he’s doing drugs or anything foolish. Dave promises him that he’s not, so his dad is cool with this answer, adding how Dave is too smart to do anything stupid.

Unfortunately, Dave knows that his renewed interest in being Kick-Ass is exactly that and will cost him, especially with Motherfucker still wanting his head.

My Thoughts:

In an effort to get louder in every aspect of its production while remembering the bright spot of the first movie being the surprising chemistry between new stars Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Chloë Grace Moretz, Kick-Ass 2 is a solid endeavor, at times even reaching the heights of its predecessor. It may not be as relatable or as compelling from a narrative standpoint, but it picks up right where the story left off well, exploring the vastly different paths all three of the main characters take in the preceding movie’s fallout. The problem lies with how the movie is unsure if it wants to parody the comic book genre or be a respectful ode to it, as the film takes dark turn in the second half that almost seems out of nowhere. Because of this, it undercuts both angles. It is indeed a world worth revisiting, but it didn’t do nearly enough for the viewer to crave or even remotely desire a third entry in the series.

Moving past all the hangups and philosophical problems he came across in trying to be a superhero in the first movie, they give Dave a rather “high school” reason to don his costume again: he was bored. It’s not the most intricate way to setup the sequel, but it does fit the ever-changing mind of a teenager. Being a high school senior about to go out into the world, Dave doesn’t know what to do with his life. He’s lacking purpose, but he’s reminded of what he did as Kick-Ass and what it meant to people after seeing fans on the news creating a superhero movement sweeping the nation following the aftermath of the internet phenomenon Kick-Ass became. This isn’t crazy at all. The steps Kick-Ass takes in showing how a real-life superhero could come to be in the modern age was accurate in its depiction. All it takes is a view count to become a star, something still true to this day. With social media influences and YouTube stars becoming overnight celebrities, the protagonist’s arc between both movies is as authentic and relevant to today’s media culture as it gets. If anything, it was ahead of its time. Actually, despite the first movie’s presentation about how hard it would be to become a real-life superhero, we still can’t help but think over Dave’s words again while watching this movie in the present. How come no one has tried to become a superhero? Considering how quickly one can become a star with a following, this idea becomes more captivating with each day. Though it was a major theme in the first movie, Kick-Ass 2 still takes it head on again, as there is still plenty more to unpack revolving around the subject. While Dave is now dealing with a crossroads in his life in trying to figure out his new purpose and if it is still being a superhero how he should go about it, the wave of superheroes that have popped up because of Kick-Ass are now dealing with the ultimate question. Why not us? Why can’t we be like Kick-Ass? They aren’t necessarily fighting criminals left and right, but they like the idea of creating gimmicks and disguises and doing good deeds. This is being a superhero to them, and it becomes this communal bonding experience Dave didn’t expect he would start. Really, it’s not being a superhero in the traditional sense but rather role-playing, as like Dr. Gravity, some of these heroes have never been in a fight.

Those that have experience and have some roughness to them like Col. Stars and Stripes and Night-Bitch last and become cool characters to watch out for. Others that are doing this to make friends and aren’t really grasping the responsibility of becoming a superhero become a nuisance to the story rather than amusing sidepieces like the combined duo of Remembering Tommy that are just sad parents who are practically useless, Insect Man who does nothing, and Marty as Battle Guy, who only exists because Clark Duke became a recognizable face during this era of film and television for some reason. Duke’s role is expanded in Kick-Ass 2 but does nothing to deserve it either. If anything, he was funnier in the first movie with less minutes onscreen. The cast is bigger and more star-laden, but their lack of opportunities to make their roles something meaningful is disheartening, especially with Justice Forever. A faction of superheroes inspired by the legacy of Kick-Ass is a great starting point for the narrative and is the logical next step in the timeline, but they don’t do too much individually. Other than Col. Stars and Stripes, they’re just kind of there, which is a shame because Donald Faison’s Dr. Gravity looked like he had a lot more to offer, at least comedically. The others didn’t though, and this includes Marty. Night-Bitch had potential, but the relationship between her and Kick-Ass isn’t earned. It just starts to happen because they are around each other so much, and the excitement is gone when they aren’t in costume. Part of this is the point, as Night-Bitch sadly tells Dave they are superheroes “as much as we’re really dating”, how they don’t even know each other’s names, and how it’s time to get back to the real world, but it’s not a sad moment where we want them to talk it out. Dave starts mulling her words over and thinks she may have a point, it’s essentially dropped, and no one cares before or after. That’s a problem, and it’s because the relationship just didn’t carry the same honesty Dave had with Katie or with Mindy really. It’s actually shocking how little we care if the relationship succeeds this time around because it just feels unimportant to the grand scheme of things.

Here, Dave is worried if they made the world worse by their efforts because it led to the rise of supervillainy to combat them. A semi-fuck-buddy relationship is irrelevant at this juncture, even if she did get her ass kicked.

If anything, the hints of Mindy being attracted to Dave as he gets into insane shape becomes infinitely more intriguing through Chloë Grace Moretz’s gaze than Dave’s conversation with an injured Night-Bitch at the hospital. This should be enough to tell you how this attempt at developing both characters failed and got to a conclusion that could have been reached with mere conversation rather than a whole relationship angle. In addition, two notable absences in this sequel are Omari Hardwick as Marcus and Evan Peters as Dave’s friend Todd. With Hardwick, the role in the first Kick-Ass had room to grow and was guaranteed to be a part of a sequel in some way, but his performance was insignificant. For the sake of continuity, replacing actors in a sequel is usually a pet peeve, but it’s hard not to admit how much Morris Chestnut improved the “B story” of Kick-Ass 2 with a stern but heartfelt approach to being Mindy’s legal guardian. The basic role could have easily have been that of an annoying parental figure who is a hurdle for Mindy to jump over to get back to what she does best, but Chestnut’s caring Marcus understands the presence Marcus has in the Macready family, the respect he carries, and the love him and Mindy share for each other even if they don’t agree all the time. It’s a very likable supporting role. To not have Evan Peters in Kick-Ass 2 was the real loss, as Augustus Prew does nothing more than a lame impression of how Peters may have acted in the role and fails. The third best friend role loses its personality with Peters exiting, and it’s too bad because knowing the talent he is, watching him switch sides back and forth between Dave’s team and Chris’s team would have been a role he would have thrived in comedically. There’s no way he would have wasted the opportunity like Prew did. If anything, there’s a chance he would have stolen the scenes he was in. For example, the scene where they try to come up with names for Todd is just bland and unfunny. You’re telling me Evan Peters wouldn’t have made it something?

Actually, fuck Todd. (SPOILERS, SPOILERS, SPOILERS) He gave up Dave’s dad’s identity on a whim to Chris and then rejoined the heroes in the climax. What a fucking snake!

Some of Kick-Ass 2 was funny, but the screenplay was hampered by it trying to toe the line of offensive and being tongue-in-cheek enough to make sure it acknowledges they know its humor is bad. If the screenplay was written well enough, the message should be obvious through action and dialogue, but for Javier to continuously tell Chris, who already killed his mother and is a self-proclaimed supervillain, that the names he comes up with for his hired guns are too racist for his liking is a groan-inducing, moot point. If you do it once it’s funny because the irony works for a movie like this. However, saying it each time when they’re all already bad people killing good people just shows it was a desperate, thinly veiled trick to save the sequel from the label of being too offensive to digest because they are deathly afraid of backlash, despite it being an R-Rated film. The fear of being too edgy, despite the series being known for it and why it gained traction in the first place is a serious lack of integrity in the franchise’s work. It basically backed down to the critics and handicapped its characters just because the antagonists aren’t allowed to be too evil because it’s crossing the line. It’s ridiculous because their idea of when not to cross the line is fucking asinine. So, the villain is criticized by a subordinate villain for giving his team racist names, and the main villain who promises to kill the hero’s family and succeeds to some degree, draws the line at killing Col. Stars and Stripes’s DOG? Mind you, The Motherfucker was going to rape Night-Bitch at one point and only stopped because he couldn’t get hard, so he let his team just beat the shit out of her! So, the movie is saying this is okay, but killing a dog is “too evil”? Give me a fucking break! This trope is so fucking tired. Isn’t being evil the point of being a comic book supervillain? It’s not that any of us want all of this to happen. We’re not sadists. However, the audience should be allowed to come to the obvious realization that the bad guy is doing and saying BAD THINGS to establish himself as the antagonist the hero needs to stop! IT’S THE WHOLE POINT! Getting to this conclusion is rather easy for the audience without the wink-wink, “Guys, we won’t go too far! We promise!” series of “jokes” that are undermined by worse actions throughout.

This “out” they use to adhere to modern times is present in some comics too, and this fear they have in making bad people BAD takes the realism out of the equation, hindering the product as a result. They are too worried about being on the wrong side of history and are willing to throw a thousand lame jokes to ensure they can’t be blamed for anything, and it’s painfully obvious. We know the difference between an archetype and a racist name, along with the history of its use in older comics. You’re overestimating how many people don’t know this, just to make your movie safe and less authentic in its approach as a result. Considering how The Motherfucker starts a citywide movement to become supervillains to combat the superheroes, using his mafia ties to make it happen, and hiring real killers and not just disgruntled citizens to hang alongside him, Kick-Ass 2 needed to get more graphic, violent, and brutal in nature. It fit the story. Even if Christopher Mintz-Plasse is as goofy as they come and pulled off a decent comedic performance like not seeing the problem in calling Javier his evil Alfred, the narrative was calling for something nastier and darker in the midst of the black comedy. The group he starts is a real threat, and he wanted to be the figurehead behind it. To try and backtrack and act like they shouldn’t go too far with giving the members of The Toxic Mega Cunts names like Mother Russia, Black Death, and Genghis Carnage (How can you not like this name?) is just jokey shlock that straddles the fence to where they are trying to serve the fans of the first movie while trying to change the minds of the people who didn’t like the first movie. Sadly, it was a too tame for the fans and the others didn’t care. Late in the second act, the murder and beatdowns The Motherfucker helps lead that affects our heroes forever doesn’t align with Mintz-Plasse’s jokey performance of the first half of the movie because of the screenplay’s refusal to embrace where the narrative is going. Seriously, there is more devastation in Kick-Ass 2 than the first movie. It was unnecessarily heavy in selling the villainy Kick-Ass is facing. Then, they want to act like The Motherfucker shouldn’t go too far in killing a dog or giving dumb names to his cohorts because he might be able to secure redemption?

No, he went too far to the point of no return, killing family members and was near an attempted rape. That is where you should draw the line, not the naming of criminals. At one point, Chris gets in the face of the terrifying head of the family in Uncle Ralph in Rikers to tell him his plan and still goes over Ralph’s head to show how badly he wants to be a supervillain. He completely undermines him and has this undying goal to kill Kick-Ass, despite seeing real evil in Ralph. He chose his side and only backtracked when he started losing. That’s not worthy of redemption. The back and forth of Chris’s arc is that of going too far and then trying to backtrack. In reality, it’s too late. It’s too goofy at the start and doesn’t fit the dark tone of the second half of the movie. Then, it gets really dark to where Chris doubles and triples down in his villainy, but they want us to remember the good side of Chris in the finale. It’s too shotty of work to ignore, and it leaves an unsettling feeling in the narrative and the finale as a whole.

They can try and act like they were trying to be mature with the story, as evidenced by the ending where they agree that they shouldn’t swear as much, but the rest of the content of the movie doesn’t serve this “intention” at all.

Taking over the crucial role Nicolas Cage had in the first movie of a star and acting heavyweight who beefs up the supporting cast until he outlives his usefulness, Jim Carrey is unrecognizable as Col. Stars and Stripes. He completely loses himself in the prosthetics and costume of the former mob enforcer and now Born-again Christian superhero who leads and coaches the team of Justice Forever. Other than a legendary Clint Eastwood impression that doesn’t get talked about enough, there has been no inkling of Jim Carrey being able to pull off the role of a badass. If we were involved in the casting process, I wouldn’t have even let Carry audition for such a role. I think everyone involved in the production may have known this as well, which is why they hide Carrey’s famous face behind the makeup and such, and it’s a genius decision. It allows for the performance to bleed through and for Carrey to become the man behind the mask. The character itself serves as a callback to the realism of being a superhero and how to make a difference when dealing with real-world criminals, though through a different lens. The rest of Justice Forever are shocked at Stars and Stripes’s brutality in taking out the doorman, infiltrating Kim’s poker den while pointing a gun to the guy’s head, and having Eisenhower bite the guy’s dick. Nevertheless, it doesn’t go in the direction the viewer assumes it will go. Initially, we think his role in the story will be the comic book trope of “If the hero kills him, isn’t he just as bad as the villain?”. Instead, he inches near the line but doesn’t cross it. Yes, he gets violent with his axe handle, but he’s also dealing with a guy who kidnaps young women. Plus, Stars and Stripes himself is an ex-mob enforcer. That doesn’t just leave you. Still, he has conviction in his intent, and it’s enough to scare the bad guys, which is needed in a group of obvious inexperience. Criminals can smell fear out of those who haven’t been involved in real danger, and Stars and Stripes’s role in Justice Forever is a way to curtail that and show them how this time around, the superheroes are leveling up to improve on what Kick-Ass has done, not do the same thing.

It works too, and he quells their concerns by showing the others the gun was empty. It’s all about instilling fear and demanding the job get done on the spot, leaving no opportunity for the bad guy in question to get one up on the heroes. It’s strategized well, and Stars and Stripes legitimizes not only this new team, but the sequel’s entertainment value as a whole, becoming one of the revered characters of the series. Carrey still throwing in perfectly timed jokes with his gruff delivery was also hilarious like him constantly getting on Battle-Guy to not take the lord’s name in vain after taking out the doorman and then before entering the poker game with “Oh, and try to have fun. Otherwise, what’s the point?”. He gets all the laughs outside of Moretz. With this, Kick-Ass 2 proves once again that Jim Carrey can actually do anything. With this being said, having him go through nearly the exact same character arc Big Daddy did in the first Kick-Ass, with him being the mentor to Dave and all the others instead of Damon to Mindy, was too much of a retread. The end of his arc was frustrating more than it was the shocker it was clearly set up to be. The same can be said when John Leguizamo’s Javier exits the picture, as his reaction to Chris’s madness was arguably the funniest part of the movie and kept things light when it was needed. The severe underutilization of these two veteran comic actors just added to Kick-Ass 2‘s problem in that it was a spoiling of riches. It doesn’t waste the opportunity it’s given because a lot of elements like including these stars in the first place, upping the action, and adding a lot more development to the principal characters does do a lot to make the sequel worth checking out if you’re a fan of the first one, but it does ultimately underwhelm.

If there was ever a doubt in anyone’s head, Chloë Grace Moretz steals the show once again. In 2021’s Tom and Jerry, the biggest thing that came out of it was how Moretz in the Kayla Forrester storyline was more compelling than the cartoon stars’ involvement in the feature. This was an unexpected takeaway that I chalked up as a one-off, but after seeing random projects of hers like the Kick-Ass franchise, Movie 43, The Equalizer, and Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising, she has the coveted movie-star quality about her that attracts the viewer to her character’s story no matter what. She has the “It” factor. Unfortunately, it undermines Dave as the protagonist and supposed “star” of the franchise yet again. While his story gets mucked up by a multitude of characters that take away from him, Mindy trying to deal with ordinary life as a freshman in high school by herself and trying to remove Hit-Girl from her identity becomes more interesting than the superhero adventures of Kick-Ass. A girl trained for war having difficulty fighting her hormones is funny (“Twilight, Channing Tatum, Union J. It’s biology bitch. Don’t fight it”), and her likening her nervousness on her first date to how she felt “… the first time Big Daddy sent me into a crack den with nothing but a penknife” was a fantastic way to show the struggles this unique character is going through. She doesn’t know how to respond as Mindy to social situations, which is why she doesn’t react in violence when Brooke pulls off her elaborate prank. She knows she can’t go that far with regular people, and the mixture of emotions results in her sobbing. It’s an interesting development, and it’s cool to see her go to Dave for comfort, showing how strong their bond is ever since it started in the first movie. The follow-up might be crass for some, but I thought it was hysterical. Also, Brooke deserved it after hitting her with that evil little monologue:

“In the real world, I win. I go to an awesome college, I marry a hot guy, and I make adorable babies for my nanny to take care of while we vacay in Paris. My life is gonna rock, and yours is gonna suck. No matter how slutty you dress, no one is gonna wanna kiss that hole you call a mouth. So why don’t you spare us all the whining and slit your wrists now because the only thing that’s going to ruin my day is looking at your face one more second”.

Come on Marcus. Brooke deserved way more than what she got. If anything, Mindy took it easy on her.

It’s great for Moretz because it’s a fantastic showcase of her burgeoning star appeal and ability to balance the humor and dramatic portions of Mindy’s life, while not losing the heart of what made Hit-Girl such a fan favorite, but Kick-Ass 2 being about Kick Ass, and Kick Ass’s story being nothing more than okay, is not good. We can’t even blame Aaron Taylor-Johnson. He’s all-in as the protagonist and does what is asked of him, but Dave is aimless, stays in the shadows, wastes more time exploring than doing, and lets things happen for everyone else. If it was done right, the screenwriter would have finally let Dave take the movie by force to remind the audience why this is his movie and his journey. Some of it is felt in the climax when he shows up by himself (at first) to face The Motherfucker and calls him by his real name (and then “Little bitch” right after), and it’s really felt in the ending when we see the insane physical shape he gets into, implying the future is bright for the superhero. Nevertheless, it’s way too late in a movie where he is billed as the star of the show. The goal of Kick-Ass 2 is for Dave to really understand that his purpose is to be a superhero, and it should take the entire narrative to get there. However, he was still presented as secondary in importance leading up to this conclusion, which is why it undermines the intentions of this sequel.

On a side note, Kim’s subtitles turning into captions like a comic book was very cool, the running gag of Motherfucker’s shark dying because it’s in a tank with the wrong water was amusing, and Mother Russia’s backstory being a former KGB agent who was locked in the Gulag until she ate her cellmate is hilarious. The neighborhood attack sequence where she’s destroying cop cars left and right was an awesome action sequence too, as was the cemetery scene and subsequent chase (“Game on cocksuckers!”). Even so, the big reveal of what the needle actually was made no logical sense. Why wouldn’t Mindy just tell Dave what it was? There is no benefit to hiding this information from him and what it was proved crucial. It could have helped immensely! Mindy is smart enough to know what Dave thinks it is, so why doesn’t she tell him, knowing it could help him?

The dueling father problems Dave and Mindy go through can work for development of one of the characters, but it gets to be too much of the same thing when they’re both dealing with similar issues at the same time. Dave’s dad arguing that finding out Dave was taking drugs would have been easier for him to take than crimefighting is a slight overreaction, but he does make a good point in reminding Dave of the real world and its real consequences, as harsh as it may seem. Again, this isn’t a comic book. Real people are dying. When you die, there is no sequel. Mindy knows this, but she’s been preparing for it her whole life. The question is if Dave can handle it, and later The Motherfucker himself. Though his argument with his dad ends on a sour note, as Dave tells his father that his life has no meaning in comparison to the rest of the world, Dave’s dad’s words are proven to be true regardless. Dave comes to the realization with Mindy too, and the conversation is so raw and unrelenting in its admittance of failure that it doesn’t even feel right for the characters to continue the mission after this pivotal, game-changing exchange. They had the same issue in the first movie when Dave talked about having something to live for made it impossible for someone to be a superhero in real life. These points are too valid for their own good. If the writer doesn’t throw in a counterpoint to keep the viewer guessing, we can’t help but agree with the initial stance. In both cases, no counterpoint is given, which makes us question why the heroes continue to go on because they honestly shouldn’t. The troubling part of all of this is the discussion Dave has with his father and how he promises him he will give up being a superhero. Ultimately, it leads to Dave realizing he has to be his own man and make his own decisions, turning into him leading the charge into battle instead and completely going back on his word to his father. Even though it has to happen because it’s what we came to see, the way they got there by throwing away such an emotional promise between father and son to the side is deeply unsettling. This needed to be handled better from a writing perspective to convince us Dave needed to do it for the sake of his own soul, especially after the heartfelt exchanges Garrett M. Brown and Taylor-Johnson share in the second half of the movie.

Still, it’s Dave’s life, and the conclusion was going to be the inevitable. The way it was handled with Mindy however flowed a lot better. The message of refusing to be someone she’s not and having to stop evil if she sees it is a cool way to set up her return. Obsession with revenge isn’t healthy, and Marcus is correct about how Mindy’s dad may have influenced her mind to possess these certain traits. Mindy even admits Damon may have took her childhood away, but she tells Marcus that she’s not sure if it was a bad thing because she was given a gift. Why spend four years trying to figure out who you are if you already know? It’s a revelation regarding her act that we haven’t even considered and creates for a cool moment in the story of Hit Girl. Plus, it’s a great argument for people who bypass college to work in the trades, so they got that too. Also, Marcus overstays his welcome at this point anyway. Mindy is literally trying to tell him about The Motherfucker’s hideout, how he has an army, and is making homemade bombs, and he has the audacity to bring up how Mindy promised her to not get involved. Dude, can you not see the bigger fucking picture here?!

In the end, did these heroes make the world a better place, or did they just finish something that began when Dave first became Kick-Ass? If things were done right, both could have been true, with the former sending the crowd home happy. In reality, it’s strictly the latter. Actually, the real message behind this entire series is that if you’re going to go all-in on something, don’t half-ass it, especially if it’s dangerous. It’s either that or being brave is all you need to be a superhero in real life, though I like my conclusion more. Both Kick-Ass movies still work as one collective, but it’s obvious Kick-Ass 2‘s intention was to reach for the stars. Instead, it settled for a decent-sized mountain. It was still a mildly entertaining effort, but it just doesn’t reach the levels in which we hoped for and they teased.