The Adventures of Pluto Nash (2002)

Starring: Eddie Murphy, Randy Quaid, Rosario Dawson, Jay Mohr, Peter Boyle, Luis Guzmán, Joe Pantoliano, James Rebhorn, Pam Grier, John Cleese, Burt Young, Miguel A. Núñez Jr., Illena Douglas, and Alec Baldwin
Grade: D+

The Adventures of Pluto Nash is nowhere near as bad as people say it was, but a lot of its criticism is warranted. That’s for sure.

Summary

In the year 2080, there is a colony on the moon known as “Little America”. In Little America, there is the nightclub Frankowski’s, featuring the Scottish owner and main performer Anthony “Tony” Frankowski (Mohr). Sporting a kilt and playing the accordion, Tony performs on stage to a crowd of very few. His friend Pluto Nash (Murphy) is there to support him, but he’s even having trouble enjoying himself. Afterwards, Tony pours a beer into a used glass for Pluto, and Pluto is disgusted with it, seeing the lipstick mark on the glass. Tony goes on to defend his kilt by saying people will think of “Scottish Crooning” when they see him, but Pluto points out how this is the problem. No one knows what Scottish Crooning is and asks Tony if he made it up, which Tony confirms. Pluto argues that if he’s going to be a crooner, he should be Italian and refer to himself as “Anthony Frantuchi” or something. They start going through names and land on “Tony Francis”, which Tony actually does like. Pluto likes it too and doubles down, telling him to lose the dress and change the name. Pluto goes to the bathroom and walks through the repulsive kitchen to get to the even more disgusting bathroom. While he’s in there, gangster Gino (Young) and his nephew Larry (Lillo Brancato) enter the club and beat up Tony, tying him to a chair. Pluto can hear the commotion and exits the bathroom to see what’s going on. Tony calls for Pluto’s help, prompting Gino to point his gun at Pluto because he knows of him. He asks Pluto when he got out of prison, and Pluto reveals it was only about a week ago. Gino shakes Pluto’s hand, congratulates him, and introduces him to Larry. Gino tells Pluto that he was inside with his brother, Angelo Sotobolo. Pluto refers to Angelo by his nickname of “Angelo Cheesecake” and happily recalls playing cards with him in his cell every weekend. He jokes that Angelo would have everything catered and gives the happy Gino a hug. Gino admits Angelo thought the world of Pluto and Pluto thinks the same of Angelo. Tony chimes in to say Pluto is his best friend.

Just then, Larry sticks a funnel into Tony’s mouth and Gino grabs a bottle of battery acid to pour down his throat, leading to Pluto to put a stop to things. Gino goes over to Pluto and tells him that Tony borrowed $2.5 million from him four years ago to buy this nightclub. Larry adds that it was an easy payment plan too. Pluto asks how much Tony owes currently, and Gino reveals that it’s the same price tag because Tony didn’t pay a cent back.

Though Pluto isn’t in the smuggling business anymore, he does want to open his own nightclub, as it’s been a lifelong dream of his. Once he gets the place up and going, he’s going to sit back, light up a cigar, and just enjoy the party. Pluto offers to pay off Tony’s debt and take over the club to call it square. Gino is interested and invites him to have a drink so they can talk business. Pluto doesn’t want to do it there because of the revolting glasses, but Gino assures him they are going across the street for the drink. He also agrees to leave Tony alone, so Pluto leaves Tony in the chair and goes with Gino and Larry to go over the logistics of the deal. Seven years later, Frankowski’s is renamed “Club Pluto”, and it’s owned and operated by Pluto. It’s hugely popular and everyone loves him. After pouring some drinks for Tommy and his friend and saying the rest is on the house once Tommy reveals he’s celebrating his divorce, Pluto goes over and tells the DJ to crank up the music to keep the energy up. Next, Pluto stops Migel (Núñez Jr.), and they happily talk about how lively the night is for a Tuesday before Miguel excuses himself to talk to a girl. Pluto pulls out a cigar, but Dina Lake (Dawson) bumps into him, which causes him to drop it. She goes to pick it up, but someone accidentally steps on it. After she apologizes while giving it back to him, he goes to walk away. Dina pursues and asks if she can talk to Pluto, not realizing it’s him. Pluto plays along and asks why she would want to talk to a lowlife like that, and she comments that it’s personal. Pluto brings up how he doesn’t even know who she is, revealing he is in fact Pluto. Surprised, she details how she is a singer that came all the way from Salt Lake City, Utah. She got a gig and they gave her this one-way ticket to the Moon, but the guys who owned the nightclub sold it and she’s dead broke now. She wants to go home, so she pleads with him for a job. Pluto isn’t interested. He says there are plenty of other clubs up there who could use a good singer, but they have a DJ here.

Pluto turns to leave, but Dina persists. She says her Moon Card expired, and she was told Pluto is the only person in town who might overlook that. Pluto questions who told her something like that, so she says it was her father, Nicholas Lake. Pluto has never heard of him. It’s not until she refers to him by his nickname of “Nicky Sticks” that he realizes he does know him and he relaxes a bit more. Dina doesn’t like to call in favors, but she reminds Pluto that Nicky saved his life in ’76. Pluto corrects her, saying he saved Nicky’s life and lost a car in the process. He argues that unless she has a brand-new Plymouth outside with his name on it, he’s got nothing to say to her. Realizing her dad lied to her, she apologizes and sadly goes to leave. Feeling bad, Pluto stops her and thinks he may have something for her. Excited, Dina talks about potentially doing two shows a night for five nights a week, but Pluto corrects her. He was thinking more along the lines of six nights a week waiting tables, suggesting she can save up her tips to make enough money to get home. Dina accepts. Elsewhere in town, Mogan (Pantoliano) and Kelp (Victor Varnado) show up and head over to Club Pluto’s once it closes. Acting as representatives of the Lunar Grand Hotel, they are let in to speak with Pluto. Privately, Mogan offers Pluto $10 million for the club, but Pluto isn’t sure. Currently, he owns the most successful club in Little America. Why would he want to sell? Just then, Kelp puts his feet on Pluto’s desk, so Pluto shoves his feet off and Kelp falls out of his chair and to the ground. Kelp is about to attack, but Pluto stops him and introduces them both to his friend, bodyguard, and android Bruno (Quaid). Mogan suggests it might be time for a trade-in since Bruno is an older ’65 model, but Bruno states that he’s a ’63 deluxe. Kelp insults him over how ancient he is, but Bruno is quick to respond that Kelp’s sister didn’t seem to mind. Kelp tries to attack, but Bruno grabs him by the face and shoves him back into his chair. Kelp is about to unholster his gun, but Pluto pulls out his first to stop Kelp, saying Bruno can be fixed but he can’t.

Mogan calms things down and puts a briefcase on the table. He tells Pluto that this is nonnegotiable. Rex Crater is buying his club. Pluto isn’t moved. In fact, he was wondering when Rex’s boys were going to come from him. He opens the package Mogan gives him and takes a look at the money. Funnily enough, Hilary Clinton is on the $10,000 bill stacks. Still, Pluto declines the offer, adding that nobody in Little America will sell their place if he has his way because they like this town just the way it is. He points them towards the door. Mogan accepts this but warns Pluto that Rex Crater doesn’t like to be disappointed. Pluto jokes that he will have to send Crater a case of Scotch. In the main area of the club, Miguel congratulates Dina on a great first night. Before she leaves though, he wants her to take up a drink to Pluto in his apartment above the club because he has to lock up the back. She’s fine with it but asks Miguel if this is some “send up the new girl” kind of thing because she doesn’t do that. Miguel assures her that Pluto wouldn’t do such a thing. Dina enters and finds Pluto crunching some numbers. She asks him if he wants her to make the drink for him, but Pluto says he mixes his own martinis. After saying this, he puts the olive in his mouth and uses the two bottles to mix it in his mouth, swallowing it without using a glass. Once Dina thanks him again for the job, they are interrupted by a video call. Pluto takes it, and it’s Mogan on the screen. Pluto is angry he’s calling at this time of the night and hangs up on him. Dina sees a framed picture on Pluto’s table of him and Tony and is shocked that he knows the now famous “Tony Francis”. Pluto confirms, adding that he knew him when he was Anthony Frankowski. He goes on about how they grew up together until they are interrupted by another call from Mogan, who gives Pluto one last chance to change his mind on Crater’s offer. Pluto refuses and hangs up again before Mogan could argue. Dina asks what’s going on, so Pluto tells her about Rex Crater trying to buy him out.

She questions why they are so set on buying Club Pluto, so Pluto explains how Crater has gone to the City Council because they’re about to approve gambling there. If Crater gets his way, the moon will turn into a big casino.

Dina jokes that he can’t sell his club until she makes enough money to get home, and Pluto laughs saying he will let them know she has to get her money first. Suddenly, a bomb goes off and destroys a lot of the inside of Club Pluto. Pluto takes Dina to the ground for cover. Once they stand up, Pluto grabs his gun and heads downstairs to see the place in shambles. Bruno pops out to say a bomb detonated and they need to evacuate. They get outside, and Pluto is still trying to process what happened. As he talks, a laser is seen on his head presumably from a nearby gun, so Dina shoves Pluto to safety directly into Bruno who catches him. Pluto spots the shooter in Jimmy and runs after him, while telling Bruno to stay with Dina to protect her. Dina sees a suspicious man on a staircase making a phone call and points him out to Bruno, so Bruno intercepts the call and vocalizes what is said in the man’s call. The guy states on the phone that Pluto is alive, and he took off after Jimmy who is headed for the Vac. Bruno states that the “Vac” is The Perfect Vacuum, and it’s located at the corner of Glenn Avenue and 5th. The phone details don’t compute with Bruno because he can’t listen and hear at the same time since he’s an older model, so Dina guides him to help in saving Pluto. They both run, but Bruno is noticeably slower. Unfortunately, he’s at top speed. It’s just another part of being an older model again. At the same time, Pluto chases Jimmy through the city streets and into The Perfect Vacuum before tackling him to the ground when inside. He yells at Jimmy while pointing his gun at him (“You blow up my wood barstools? You know how hard it is to get wood on the moon?”). Before he can do anything, Pluto sees the reflection of Kelp and another henchman. Pluto reacts quick enough to stand up and use Jimmy as a hostage. He challenges them to shoot around Jimmy, but Kelp states it’s easier to shoot through him. They shoot Jimmy to get to Pluto, so Pluto throws Jimmy at the two of them to buy him some time.

Just then, several more assassins from the upper-level fire at Pluto, so he jumps behind the bar to take cover. Dina runs in to tell Pluto it’s a trap, and Kelp and the other guy turn to kill her. Pluto shoots the one guy, so Kelp takes cover, allowing Dina to also jump for cover. In the middle of the shootout, Dina grabs a gun from the ground and starts blind firing like crazy, hitting several of the assassins but almost shooting Pluto at the same time. Bruno walks in to stop Dina and has her wait outside before pulling out his two handguns and shooting down the entire upper level and the lights, allowing for him and Pluto to escape. On the way out the door, Pluto sets the gun to its tripod mode and puts it on a ledge to fire directly at the door for cover fire. It’s actually a really cool design. As Pluto, Dina, and Bruno get out of there, Dina gives Pluto shit about how he walked into an obvious trap, but Pluto argues that he was going to walk right out until she showed up. He tells her that if he does need help, he will ask for it. Dina is done and is set on getting out of there. Pointing out how she saved his life twice, she asks Pluto to make up for it by loaning her enough money to get home. Pluto would be down, but he notes how they are going to be looking for her at every bus station and shuttle launch in the city. Dina doesn’t think they know what she looks like, but Pluto reminds her how every club in the city has a biometric camera system. They took hundreds of pictures of her. He comments how the only way she is going home is in a box. Not knowing where else to go, Pluto leads her and Bruno to the Garden of Paradise motel run by his friend and manager Roy (Bill Corday). Explaining how his place is being “redecorated” and they need a place to stay overnight, he asks for a room and Roy obliges. In the room, Bruno recharges while Dina talks about how she hates the Moon. Pluto explains that Mooners hate Earthlings because Earthlings think everything back home is better. Pluto points out how he went back once and the air smelled funny, he was sneezing all the time, it rained every day, and there were bugs and shit everywhere.

The only thing he liked about it was that he could see the Moon at night.

Since Bruno can’t hear them while he’s recharging, Dina brings up how Pluto’s bodyguard should be able to keep up with him on the way to a gunfight. She suggests he trade Bruno in, but Pluto refuses to consider this. He has 20 years of rill-hopping experience wired into him, meaning smuggling. It’s what landed Pluto in prison. He admits Bruno isn’t the fastest thing, but he got Pluto out of a lot of tight squeezes. He goes to leave to talk to an old friend and tells Dina to stay to watch Bruno, something she doesn’t appreciate. Pluto finds his friend Rowland (Boyle) in a pool hall. Rowland says every low life in town is looking to kill Pluto right now, but he’s not worried. They play a game of 8-ball, and Rowland asks how Pluto’s mother Flura (Grier) is doing. He comments that she’s still breaking hearts. Rowland argues that Flura should have married him, but Pluto replies that he should have went to the gym. Rowland counters that he would have lost the weight if Flura married him. While he says this, he’s eating a slice of pizza. Changing the subject, Pluto asks for help because he wants to get to Rex Crater. However, Rowland says no one gets to Crater. Pluto questions who Crater is, and Rowland explains how he’s a myth, an enigma of a person. He lives in a penthouse above the Lunar Grand Hotel and never comes out. Bringing up how Rowland was a cop for 20 years, Pluto thinks he should have some idea as to who Crater is. Rowland does say that some people think Crater is a clone. There was a clone doctor named Runa Pedanken. She made a big name for herself creating an entire basketball team from one old guy, the Air Jordans. Right after cloning was outlawed back on Earth, Pedanken came up to the Moon. She was the best in the field until she was murdered about 8 years ago. Hearing this, Pluto thinks he needs to hack into the police files, so Rowland knows Pluto means him instead. After this, Pluto hits a wild shot in their pool game. Following this, they are in Rowland’s place, and he does a global search on his computer for Pedanken. Unfortunately, the file was deleted. Pluto doesn’t think Pedanken was doing this by herself, so he wonders who was working with her.

Rowland remembers she had an assistant they questioned for days about the murder but got nothing. Pluto thinks it’s because he has no finesse. With this, he asks who the assistant is and where he can find her. Rowland says her name is Dr. Mona Zimmer (Douglas). She runs a body alteration shop on Microsoft and 6th (“You see that’s what I love about you Rowland. I ask you a simple question and four hours later, I get a simple answer”). Back at the motel, Bruno is done charging and notices Pluto is gone. Dina tells him that Pluto is out somewhere, which surprises Bruno because he usually doesn’t go anywhere without him. He also tells Dina that he heard her joke about him when he was charging. Just then, Pluto walks in and asks Bruno for the old badge he has. Once he gets it, Pluto tells Dina that he needs her help. Bruno is excited about what’s happening, but Pluto tells him to stay behind for this one, which annoys him. Pluto and Dina go to the body clinic Mona works at and pose as a married couple looking to make body alterations. Mona looks at her wide-open schedule but acts like she just had a cancellation and can move them up the list. Her first question is if they are original or have they been “previously improved”. After they say they are all original, Mona asks what they want done. Pluto comments on Dina’s behalf, saying they want to do some ass resculpting for her and to get a bit more “bubblage”. Dina argues she has a great ass, and Pluto agrees but “reminds” her about how they already discussed how he wants something to hold onto. Annoyed, Dina tells Mona they want to do something about Pluto’s big mouth, but Pluto changes the subject to ask about some catalogues they can look through. Mona takes them over to a platform where their bodies are scanned, and they are shown virtual displays of what their bodies could look like as they stare into a computer-generated mirror. One of the options is “The Amazon”, which makes them look wildly tall and lengthy. Next is “The Venice Beach”, which makes them both look like bodybuilders. They both like it, but Pluto thinks Dina needs bigger tits and a bigger ass. All Mona does is press a few buttons to make both larger, and Pluto likes it.

They follow Mona over to discuss terms at her desk. The first question is if they are paying in cash or wanting to follow their flexible finance plan. Showing his wallet, Pluto says cash. He also has his medical records, but he doesn’t have the police permit she requests. Instead, Pluto offers side money to forget it, but she refuses this because they could be fugitives or killers. Pluto explains they are just a couple trying to put the spark back in their relationship and they don’t think they need to reveal such details to the police. With Pluto pleading with her, Mona decides to take the money and tells them to come back tonight at 8PM sharp. However, they will need another $10,000 upon completion. Pluto uses this opportunity to flash the old badge, acting as if he’s an undercover cop who just busted her. With this, he demands answers to his questions, so she promises to tell him. With this, he brings up Pedanken, but she immediately states she never heard of her. Pluto tells Dina to put the cuffs on her, so a confused Dina slowly gets up. Panicking, Mona stops her and reveals what she knows. Towards the end, Pedanken was dealing with some pretty heavy characters, but she didn’t tell Mona who and she didn’t keep any records. One day however, she walked into Pedanken’s office as she was showing one of the guys out and he left his briefcase behind. The initials “WZW” were embossed on it in gold, and it was made out of genuine alligator skin. Pluto comments that alligator skin is an earth good, so this is a good clue. Besides this, Mona swears she doesn’t know anything else. After Pluto and Dina leave, Dina lets him know that for the record, she has never gotten a complaint about her ass as Pluto tries to pass it off as part of the scam for Mona. They get back to the motel and find Flura waiting for them while she readies a gun. She wanted to see if Pluto was alright. Pluto introduces Flura to Dina, and Flura asks what’s going on because he might wind up dead. Pluto points out how he has to take care of the guys who blew up his club, but Flura tells him to get off the Moon instead. Pluto doesn’t want to hear this, but Flura starts yelling at him to listen to his mother.

He says he will get off the Moon just to shut her up, but he has to get something to eat first.

He tells Bruno to get some beer and sandwiches, but Bruno reads a magazine and ignores him. Flura comments that Pluto should be nicer to his robot, making Pluto realize Bruno has been bitching to Flura about him. Kelp leads a group of henchmen to the motel and right up to Roy at the front desk. He threatens to kill Roy to get Pluto’s room number, sticking a gun into his neck. Roy gives it up without protest but calls Pluto’s room to tell him they are coming for him. Pluto, Dina, Flura, and Bruno run out of the room and sneak into another where a female android is cleaning up. Right away, Bruno is attracted to the model DRL-84, but Pluto yells at him to check the window to see if they can escape there. Bruno gets back on track and checks, commenting that it’s too high to jump. Pluto finds these bolts holding up a wall in the room, so he has Bruno take them off just in time for a couple of henchmen who bust through the door. The wall falls directly onto the henchmen. Pluto and Bruno stand on top of the wall and jump on it a few times for good measure. Pluto leads them out the door, but two bad androids point guns at them and have them stop. Flura appears behind the androids and acts like she doesn’t know them, asking the androids if she can walk through. As soon as the androids turn their attention to Flura, the others jump for cover. Flura shoots down both androids, and they all get out of there. Upon escaping, Pluto calls Rowland and tells him that he has to get to Far Side, and he needs some space suits. Following this, Rowland meets him at a public spot to give him the space suits and questions how he’s going to get to Far Side. Pluto assures him that he’s arranged for transportation. In reality, he just steals a car, using a Code Generator serial number. Dina questions why they can’t just rent one instead of stealing one, but Pluto states they can’t rent a special car like the Chrysler DeSoto S-5000. It cruises on a 14-inch cushion of air, hikes up to 64 inches in rough terrain, it’s heat resistant, meteor resistant, with torque compressor power thrust, and has “a kick-ass sound system”.

He gets an ignition chip from Bruno directly from his head, and Dina laughs at the fact that a car and a bodyguard have interchangeable parts. It works though, and they get inside the car. The virtual assistant James (Cleese) appears on the dashboard, expecting the owner of the car in a Mr. Vandervoort. James thinks Vandervoort is early, not knowing the difference between Pluto and this Vandervoort. So, Pluto puts on a British accent and talks about how he’s surprising Mrs. Vandervoort with some jam and scones and picking her up at a spa on the Far Side. Finally, James sees that Pluto is just some random guy stealing the car and gives him three seconds before he alerts the authorities. However, Pluto reveals to James that he already disconnected his alarm relay. On top of that, Bruno points a gun at James, demanding he get the car moving (“Good God, I’m being stolen!”). With this, James takes the car out. After driving by a Trump Realty billboard, Pluto tells James to take over the autopilot for a while, but James refuses to be an accomplice in this. Pluto explains he’s a hostage, not an accomplice, forcing him to do it. Moving to the backseat, Pluto promises Dina he won’t let anything happen to her. She appreciates it and asks how long a night lasts here to which Pluto responds two weeks. She thinks this is depressing, but he thinks it’s nice. To show her, he flips the switch on the moon roof of the car to show her the stars. He talks about how when he was a little boy, he used to come out here with Rowland and would count the stars, dreaming about what was out there. James interrupts to call his story drivel, but Pluto ignores the comment to ask what he has to drink. James states they don’t have anything, but it doesn’t take long for Pluto to find champagne and caviar. Seeing him pour up, James thinks Pluto is going to have sex with Dina. Pluto turns to give Dina her drink, but she fell asleep. Pluto smiles and covers her with his jacket.

It’s off to the Far Side. Nevertheless, this isn’t going to stop until Pluto finds Rex Crater.

My Thoughts:

The Adventures of Pluto Nash is known as both one of the biggest box office bombs in history and Eddie Murphy’s worst film. It’s not that the movie is outright terrible, but the reason why the criticism is amplified to such a degree is that it has no business in failing to be more than what it was, especially considering how much it has going for itself. With a $100 million budget, a wide-open premise of space travel as a background, an ensemble supporting cast behind one of the biggest stars in Hollywood, fantastic set designers, great special effects for the time period, and an intriguing concept to go off of, you’re not allowed to be this basic. Despite all the shiny objects, bright colors, and science fiction fun however, something just doesn’t click.

The key issue is that the movie isn’t sure what it wants to be while simultaneously trying to be something it’s not. Is it a sci-fi comedy, a science fiction action movie, or an action comedy? The distinction between the three is bigger than you think. It’s been said that star Eddie Murphy chose the project because he wanted a “straight script”, something that would be given to a Sylvester Stallone or a Harrison Ford. With this, he arrogantly claimed that he would “bring the comedy” to it. Suffice to say, Murphy couldn’t save it with whatever he brought to the table humor-wise. Nevertheless, there are some things that should be admitted. There are a lot of elements to this screenplay that could work if it was indeed played straight. With a director who excels in visuals or has an artistic style willing to take chances with the look and feel of a film, there is a lot in Pluto Nash‘s core that suggests it may have succeeded as a serious, neo-noir, science fiction action thriller. A colony on the Moon and a nightclub owner being at the center of the action as he’s chased by gangsters is an exciting enough premise that works with the right tone. Even if the material was changed to reflect this direction however, Murphy would still be miscast. Changing the title and getting rid of “The Adventures of…” prefix would also be a crucial step. Nevertheless, you give a filmmaker like a Michel Gondry type this production, rewrite the screenplay to give it a dramatic noir feel with science fiction action, and give the starring role to a Harrison Ford, Wesley Snipes, Bruce Willis, Mel Gibson, Vin Diesel, Don Cheadle, or Guy Pearce, and this film could succeed. Rowland’s line of “Detective work was a lot easier before they invented cloning” belongs in a dramatic noir film. It could have even been the opening line of the movie in a voiceover! With Murphy in the starring role, the problem is that his only experience with trying to balance the seriousness of a screenplay with his brand of humor gave audiences Vampire in Brookyln and Metro. Neither were that bad in totality, but both suffered greatly from its inability to pull off the balance convincingly and not fully committing to either side, giving off a wonky final result.

The same happens here. You can tell Murphy tries to go Metro-like as the protagonist, but it’s too brightly colored, upbeat in style and tone, and fun looking for this type of performance to compliment the production as a whole. Seriously, it looks like it was created with an agreed upon deal in place for a commercial tie-in with McDonald’s, with a series of Pluto Nash toys for their Happy Meals.

With The Adventures of Pluto Nash, the film looks like an extravagant, science fiction adventure comedy with a superstar like Eddie Murphy in the forefront. Unleashing Murphy and letting him loose to make fun of the sci-fi genre could have been what Steve Martin was to the private investigator/noir genre with the comedy Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid. THAT is what should have been the idea with Pluto Nash, and the viewer is even teased with this in the opening of the movie, as they are treated to this odd rap remix of “Blue Moon” that was so outrageous that it doesn’t fit anything less than a goofy comedy. By the way, we implore you to look up the song. It makes you wonder who requested such a disaster be made for a movie’s soundtrack, though it will undoubtedly be someone’s argument years from now as to why the film is a cult classic. Either way, had Murphy embraced the over-the-top potential, the twist in the climax could have been hilarious, but they played it confusingly straight and narrow to where it falls flat. If there was ever a time for Murphy to do his Peter Sellers routine of playing a second role in the movie with heavy makeup and different costuming, it would have been in Pluto Nash. However, he tries to sell it as this earth-shattering serious twist, but it’s just too goofy to be taken seriously (SPOILERS, SPOILERS, SPOILERS). Look, you cannot have a scene where Eddie Murphy fights a clone of himself, and we have to act as if it’s a serious and intense moment. The situation is ridiculous and should be acknowledged as such. It took itself way too seriously, and Eddie being the cool straight man is a disservice to his comedic talents. Even if he has done action comedies before, everything about the Total Recall-like set design, the tone, the look, and the production itself was screaming for madcap comedy. Why did Murphy decide that this was the time to try and be the cool guy?

This is just one of the many decisions that undercut the potential of the movie.

The actor is in a completely different mindset regarding what the film should be, compared to everyone else who is involved. Nothing surrounding Murphy’s choices as an actor, or the feature as a whole, coincides with the production, marketing, or promotion of the movie. It’s an all-around miscommunication. For instance, look at the poster. Everything about it makes it look like Pluto Nash is going to be this high-concept space comedy of epic proportions. Murphy himself looks like a space explorer with his space suit, he’s doing the goofy eyebrow look which suggests a comedic flare, the vibrant, neon-colored print signals humor and a kitschy, pop art production design, and “The Adventures of…” title brings with it a comedic connotation. If a viewer did zero research beforehand and just saw this poster while at the movie theater, or sees it while scrolling through a streaming service today, literally every sign points to this film being a big-time send-up of large scope, sci-fi action epics starring one of the greatest comedy superstars in the history of cinema. Actually, that’s what The Adventures of Pluto Nash SHOULD have been. Had this been the idea from the get-go with a motivated and still peak Murphy at the helm, it could have been a comedy for the ages! To everyone’s disappointment, it was played as a hardline action comedy, but it wasn’t funny and the action wasn’t exciting in the slightest. Instead of a manic Eddie Murphy being the hero, but also making fun of Star Wars, Star Trek, Flash Gordon, and Buck Rodgers while doing his own thing as the new king of science fiction heroism as the titular Pluto Nash (a great name for a main character in a science fiction film by the way), we got a basic action comedy that just wasn’t all that compelling. He’s not a space adventurer like the poster would suggest either. There is no intergalactic space travel nor fantastical villains the heroic “Pluto Nash” takes on during his travels. He only wears the space suit for a small stretch of the action.

He’s simply a nightclub owner with a gun who lives on the Moon.

If this was always the case, the marketing of the movie, the title, the main actor, and the manner in which it’s directed doesn’t mix with the premise. It’s a complete misfire. Murphy tones his persona down and plays it disappointingly low-key, tunes it up at the wrong times and teases the audience to think the comedy is coming so they are even further disappointed, and the elements that should support him from a comedic standpoint like Randy Quaid, John Cleese, Luis Guzmán, Jay Mohr, and a small role from Alec Baldwin are average at best. Quaid is too much in almost everything he does, and this continues here, topping himself at being even more excruciatingly unfunny as Pluto’s trusted robot Bruno. He’s believable as an android, but he doesn’t garner a single laugh, despite clearly being constructed to be a comedic sidekick. He is even more awkward when they try to make him a centerpiece of the action, with him duel-wielding pistols and shooting out bad guys left and right like Disney’s Goofy if he was The Terminator. It’s obnoxiously unbelievable and hard to ignore. The best joke they got out of Mohr was his Tony character trying to make Scottish Crooning a thing. Other than that, he offered almost nothing, as did the script itself. If it was meant to be a straight action comedy be design, why would they hire so many comedic actors and give them nothing to do humor-wise? Why not just hire regular veteran supporting actors to maintain the tone Murphy clearly wanted? Again, there was a colossal miscommunication between the performers and the behind-the-scenes team that cost Pluto Nash any semblance of succeeding. Cleese had some funny lines, but he has about 2 minutes of screentime, so it’s whatever. Baldwin has a small role as mafia bigwig Mike Marucci that is used as a bait and switch because it’s implied that he is more than likely the villain, but it’s nothing more than the one scene he’s in. In reality, he SHOULD have been the villain instead of the underwhelming clone “twist” that we got instead.

In their defense, they did utilize the budget well in world-building this colony on the Moon. It’s fully realized from that perspective, even if it’s less imaginative than what we thought it was going to be. Still, it’s an ambitious production, which can be appreciated. However, there is too much to unpack in the runtime given. The world-building and technology commonplace in the makeup of Little America is too vast, and they waste too much time in explaining what’s available to them in the year 2087 rather than focusing on the dialogue, making interesting characters, or coming up with entertaining and involving scenarios to captivate the viewer. The exception is the joke about the cryogenic Chihuahua, which Pluto explains and gets to the punchline in a timely fashion before getting back to the story, as it’s illegal to bring pets to the Moon, but he has a friend in Juarez that freeze dries them. Apparently, five minutes in a particle wave will defrost them, and he used to get $5,000 a pop for them. Stuff like that is funny, but there just isn’t enough time to balance it while going in-depth with the more important stuff. Had this been pitched today however, it would succeed as a miniseries. That format would have benefitted the many complex ideas, the humor involved, the characters and their relationships with Pluto like Miguel A. Núñez Jr.’s Miguel, and how Little America is much more than just Macau on the Moon. For instance, the extended sequence at the body alteration place was way too long for something that gave them one singular clue in the end. It also wasn’t funny enough to warrant that much time wasted. In a single episode of a miniseries however, it would probably be a moment highlighted by fans. The French maid android they had stashed away could have been the center of another episode easily. On a side note, Illeana Douglas looks exactly like the type of person who would run a body alteration shop like that, so they got the casting correct there.

Hollywood’s go-to supporting antagonist in James Rebhorn also shows up in the second half of the movie to do exactly what we were expecting, so no complaints there either. Also in the cast is the complete opposite of Randy Quaid in Rosario Dawson, someone who is lovable in just about everything she does. Sadly, they underwrite her character to a shocking degree and make her nothing more than another female on the cast. Pam Grier is cast as Pluto’s mother, which is a cool idea, but they underutilize her too. Why wasn’t she a part of Pluto’s crew once Rex Crater’s men all come after them? After open firing on some of Crater’s android henchman and being Pluto’s mom in general, wouldn’t she be an obvious target for the bad guys? Early on, Pluto tells Dina that she can’t leave the Moon now because her picture is known everywhere due to the technological camera system in Little America. If Crater is this all-powerful villain that has this type of tech, he’s got guys everywhere, and is clearly willing to kill, wouldn’t he go after Pluto’s mother? In every action movie or thriller ever, this is the first step in the villain’s plan because it’s the most logical. If they can’t get to the hero, they snatch a family member or someone close to them to draw the hero out of hiding. Why wouldn’t this be the same for Pluto’s mom, considering she killed some of Crater’s guys anyway and helped Pluto, Dina, and Bruno escape? Wouldn’t they also have pictures of her too since the cameras are apparently everywhere? According to their own logic, she’s in danger just as much as them after that shootout. Following that action sequence, the rest of the movie’s events should have been entirely a team effort because that’s the logical story corner they write themselves into. There’s no way a diabolical villain like Crater would just forget about this. It’s not even just from a story standpoint either. Including Grier in the narrative moving forward could have helped the action scenes, the suspense surrounding it because it’s another person Pluto has to care for, and she could provide comedy just by being there.

Having to do this mission while your mother “I told you so’s” him throughout the runtime could have been amusing, as well as her intervening in Pluto getting close to Dina. Then again, Pluto and Dina never get together anyway. It’s only partially implied. Actually, maybe that’s part of what was missing. Just the one scene at Tony’s show where Pluto tries to hide his face from security by kissing Dina, and she’s happily flustered by it showed the potential for what their relationship could bring to the suspense and entertainment value of it all. Hell, it would have at least given Dina SOMETHING to do other than have basic dialogue and unfunny exchanges with Bruno. Had she started getting intrigued by the possibility of dating Pluto, and Pluto’s mom not trusting her intentions with her son, they could have had some fun arguments to add to the chaos. Eddie Murphy’s Pluto flipping out on the two arguing while he’s trying to come up with a plan could have made for some legitimate comedy. Even so, it’s all moot point anyway. Grier is used for a small section earlier in the mission and forgotten about almost immediately after. Even subplots are missed out on like the uneasy tension between Joe Pantoliano’s Mogan and James Rebhorn’s Belcher. Clearly, there is a power struggle at hand and egos are messed with in trying to fall in line under Rex Crater’s chain of command. There could have been some fun developments with more obvious ripples in Belcher’s working relationship with Mogan and Kelp, and they could have let Pluto’s finessing skills come into play again by playing devil’s advocate between the two in the climax to add to the chaotic scene. Regarding the humor, Bruno being jealous of Pluto giving attention to Dina was just lame, Bruno attacking a female slot machine that wants to fuck him yielded more questions than it induced laughter (“You’re not a robot, you’re an animal!”), and the script totally missed the opportunity Felix presented as a comic relief in the second half of the movie.

Considering how he is willing to help Pluto in anyway and is the reason Felix got into smuggling, they could have intensified his obsession with Pluto. He could have gave them even more information about himself they weren’t asking for to humorous results or begged to help Pluto in his big mission of taking out Rex Crater. Instead, Felix just saves their lives, gives them a bunch of clothes for free, Pluto personalizes an autograph on his space helmet, and he goes on and uses his trick dice at the casino on Moon Beach. He gives so much to them but isn’t given much in return at all. Granted, Pluto pays him back in the epilogue with letting him eat and drink for free at Club Pluto, but the character was yet another example of someone who could have helped the entertainment factor of the movie (“I’m Felix Laranga” -“Who?” – “You never heard of me? Because you’re stupid!”). It wouldn’t have taken much either. He could have just been the “distraction” guy once they got into the casino and it was time for Pluto to find the right elevator to use.

Despite the villain doing the usual explanation of how this all happened involving Marucci, Pedanken, and the backfiring of the clone/puppet idea, the sense of danger still isn’t felt in the climax, and that’s even after Crater shoots Mogan for no reason. What’s the big deal in setting up a big casino/gambling operation on the Moon? Pluto keeps acting as if it ruins the culture of Little America, and it’s this sort of commentary on corporations overly commercializing popular destinations like what Las Vegas has turned into compared to what it used to be. However, what makes Pluto this “white knight” club owner? He already has a background in smuggling to begin with. Why would casino-related activities bother him? If anything, he would get more customers at his club because Little America would be popping with visitors. Pluto keeps saying that Little America “isn’t a gambling town”, but why not? There is not enough stressed by the protagonist as to why we would care as much as he does about this supposedly “diabolical” culture shift plot. We know he’s motivated because his life was threatened, but he’s troubled more so by the idea of gambling taking over the Moon. Again, who gives a shit? Furthermore, there is literally no reason for Crater to keep Pluto alive at any point in time. Crater even poses the question himself in the climax and no answer is given. Add this to the list of examples of why the movie fails.

On the positive side of things, the sequence where the trio hides out at the old prospecting dome was a nice detour, and the shootout on the surface of the Moon between Pluto and Mogan’s guys was the best scene in the movie, as it was the closest to what is promised in the marketing. It’s there where you truly realize how mishandled everything is, as well as how much Bruno sticks out like a sore thumb. Had Bruno not existed and the main character was rewritten as a space adventurer/Han Solo type instead of a nightclub owner, this would have worked. Hell, Pluto is a former smuggler, so the tools are already there. When Pluto fights Johnson in an old school Star Trek style on the Moon before kicking him into the light post, and then they follow it up with the spaceship chase sequence where Pluto is neck and neck with Mogan in that tunnel and they rill hop across to safety, the evidence is there for why a Murphy-led, sci-fi epic comedy could have succeeded. This is what we needed more of! We needed the Murphy from Beverly Hills Cop or even The Golden Child, not the Murphy from Metro or Showtime. Had it been the old Murphy at the helm, the line where a worried Dina questions if he will get away and he responds with a smirk, “I always get away” would have been golden. We didn’t need John Cleese as a car’s virtual assistant rattling off quips and then offering to give up information to bad guys in exchange for a ride home, which doesn’t make sense since he’s essentially AI. We needed more scenes like that shootout on the Moon! Furthermore, I will concede that the space walk that causes Pluto and Dina to pass out because of the lack of oxygen and Bruno trying to walk them the rest of the way until his charge dies out was a major highlight from a visual sense. Unfortunately, the viewer can’t get emotional or suspend their disbelief that their heroes could die because Bruno is that weird. He just doesn’t allow us to take in the moment because of that creepy look on his face. Thankfully, the robot-fucking Felix shows up to save the day.

Out of the few legitimate laughs, Tony cloning his own wife and responding, “Who cares?” when Dina asks which one is which was great. The other is when Tony tries to propose Pluto with a plan to get to Crater. They walk through a hallway of posters with Tony on them and then get into Tony’s elevator. After he uses a poker chip as a key in the elevator and then opens the window to show him the separation of distance between the two elevators, Tony rattles off his overly complicated plan. He tells Pluto to leap onto the ledge, climb onto the wires that aren’t hot, wait an hour and a half in the elevator shaft to jump onto the roof of the other elevator once it’s time for Crater’s late supper delivery, use the casino chip to unscrew the trap door, and take the two robot guards out inside. This will lead him to an alone meeting with Crater in his suite. Hearing all of this, Pluto stares at him in silence for an extended pause and then comically deadpans, “What’s ‘Plan B’, Tony?”.

The soundtrack is strange. It has record scratches in random instrumentals, techno, the poppiest commercial pop constructed (“Everything is All Right”), and an R. Kelly cover of “Dancing in the Moonlight”. It’s all over the place, yet it still strangely fits the vibe of the movie, even if it’s sonically terrible. Maybe it’s so kitschy and random that it blends better than you’d expect. It’s hard to say. In addition, there are two aerial shots that deserve mentioning. There is an early one in the first act depicting a chase through the city streets of Little America and it looks like a cool, third-person perspective of a video game on the old PlayStation. The other is the one where Crater is lying down on the circular moving platform. It spins as the camera is directly above him, and it’s a rather cool image.

The Adventures of Pluto Nash is not the worst movie ever. That’s quite the overstatement. People who think it is simply haven’t seen enough movies in their lifetime. Even so, the film is still a terrible letdown on all accounts. The pieces are there to make an ambitious, large-scale comedy that could have been the actor’s comeback, but the colossal mishandling of the material is why there is such a disappointment in its quality. The production screamed outlandish comedy epic, star Eddie Murphy wanted a strait-laced action comedy, they tried to meet in the middle, and they failed on both ends. Again, it should have been a classic Eddie Murphy comedy where he goes all-in on the humor to lampoon the genre. Making it more of a regular sci-fi actioner with humor sprinkled in doesn’t work with this later staged, less energetic Murphy. The older the star got, the less believable he was as a potential action hero compared to his days in the 1980s. The only thing that could have salvaged the film was a complete overhaul from direction to screenplay to the main actor himself. Since that was never an option, we have to take it for what it was, a gross misuse of talent and a missed opportunity for the ages.

Fun Fact: It was rumored that Harrison Ford considered doing the film. Both Jennifer Lopez and Halle Berry turned down the role of Dina Lake.